A Press Release from an Australian company prompted me to do a little research into new developments in the field of suspect identification.
The Release is in the form of a statement from the company that is responsible for the development and deployment of the new digital system. The statement is actually the transcript of a talk given by company representative Mr Nassal Bridge, at the conference on International Development of Independent Observational Technologies (IDIOT).
The press release/ talk is as follows:
" Good morning, Fellow Attendees, my name is Nassal Bridge, and I represent an Australian company at the forefront of research and implementation of technology in the field of Facial Recognition.
The use of electronic and digital technology to scan and process facial features of individuals has been growing in recent years, with much publicity and excitement associated with its introduction. It was touted as the answer to preventing the movement of known criminals through our various domestic and international transport systems.
Unfortunately these technologies; The Facial Recognition System (FRS), the Human Recognition System (HRS), and various other developments, have failed to live up to expectations. Weaknesses in data-bases, lack of programming flexibility and poor image quality, have all contributed to making this idea seem like an unfulfilled dream. There is however, a light at the end of the tunnel.
My company, an independent, privately financed entity, with no government affiliations, has been secretly working on an innovative method which will not only aid in the identification of criminals and suspects, but make it possible for each nation around the world to have its own unique data-base of those it regards as undesirable in its community. Furthermore, this database will be administered by an independent entity, ensuring complete impartiality and anonymity. This independent entity is my company, and the system we have developed will change the world.."
"Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to present to the system of the future!!
Facial Area Recognition Traits, or FART, is how we will detect the criminal of tomorrow!!
Let's face it, folks, everybody's FART is unique!! I'll say it again! Everybody's Facial Area Recognition Trait is unique!
No two FARTs are the same, but what we need is a system to make those FARTs detectable, and that's where my company comes in. We are the National Observational Security Entity, or NOSE.
Every persons face is defined by the measurements between certain points on the face: such as between the eyes, or jawbone to jawbone. We have decided to focus on the area above the top lip, but below and between the eyes. This is where NOSE comes in. This area on the face is unique in each individual, and this Facial Area and it's unique Recognition Trait gave rise to FART.
As we implement this system throughout the world, we envisage that each FART system will be accompanied by a NOSE. Each NOSE will be structured to make it unique to each country's requirements. Yet each NOSE will still be a part of the parent company. Therefore, we can see a time when each nation will have its'own individual NOSE, sensitive to its' own FARTs, and able to pick the difference between its own FARTs and its neighbours' FARTs.
Naturally, this means that each country will have it's own unique NOSE. Some NOSEs will be big, some will be small and some countries will be more sensitive about their NOSE than other countries, and some countries will not like to talk about their NOSE at all. This is all incidental, as in the long run, each NOSE will be focussing on detecting as many FARTs as possible.
Of course, it goes without saying that individuals who do not wish to be detected will attempt to hide their FARTs in any way they can, In fact, we at NOSE have already witnessed attempts by individuals to hide FARTs by coughing, (hand over mouth), sneezing, or even by singing loudly. Needless to say, you can't hide your FART from our NOSE! In fact, a good NOSE, no matter what nationality, can detect a FART from across a crowded room, so if you have a FART, we will know about it!!
Certain situations are of course better for the detection of FARTs than others, for instance, it is difficult to hide a FART in an elevator, or a taxi, because both are enclosed spaces with a limited number of occupants, and they are all facing the one direction with no room to move. No FART can go undetected. Also, as we all know, all FARTs are individual, so after a time, when NOSEs from around the world have collected enough FARTs, we will be able to track an individual's movements by his FARTs alone.
As you can see, the future of criminal investigation will very likely comprise a bunch of expert NOSEs looking at old FARTs to determine if they are relevant to a particular situation.
Finally, I am often asked, as an expert NOSE, if there are any particular FARTs that are memorable in any way. Naturally, I don't like to talk about individual FARTs, but I can honestly say that there are one or two FARTs that always bring a smile to my face, especially late at night when I am relaxing after a good meal. This is one of the pleasures of my work.
Thank you for your time today, and the next time you are sitting in an airliner late at night, just remember; your FART is being detected by a NOSE somewhere."
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